From: M. (98/8/26)
The rumours of my impending... have
been greatly exaggerated.
I JUST WANT TO STATE, FOR
THE RECORD
THAT I LOVE MY JOB, THAT IS
TO SAY
THE JOB FOR WHICH I WAS HIRED.
THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING MORE
ENJOYABLE FOR ME THAN TO
WORK WITH
PEOPLE AS THEY CREATE, AS THEY
STRUGGLE, AS THEIR VISION GAINS
CLARITY. FROM ME THEY CAN TAKE
SKILLS WHICH I KNOW I AM TRULY
PRIVILEDGED TO POSSESS, AND FROM
THEM I AM ALLOWED INTO THEIR
FRAME
OF REFERENCE THEIR CULTURE,
THEIR
GENDER, THEIR PAIN, THEIR LIFE.
I MAKE NO PRETENSE OF
KNOWING WHAT
DRIVES ARTISTIC ENDEAVORS --- OF
WHAT MAKES ARTISTS HAVE TO
DO WHAT
THEY DO. ONLY A FOOL WOULD
CLAIM
TO HOLD SUCH KNOWLEDGE. BUT
I KNOW
THAT WHEN YOU LOOK AT THE
EYES OF
SOMEONE PRESENTING THEIR
WORK FOR
THE FIRST TIME THERE IS NEVER
CONFIDENCE THERE. SURE,
CONFIDENCE
COMES WITH TIME AND PRAISE
BUT IN
THOSE FIRST MOMENTS WHEN OTHERS
EYES FALL UPON THE EARTHLY
MANIFESTATION OF THEIR INNER
STRUGGLE, THERE IS NOTHING
BUT THE
STARKEST OF ANGST IN THEIR
EYES.
I ,AS ALL THE FACILLITATORS, SEE
ALL THAT HAS GONE INTO THE
FINISHED
PRODUCT --- THE
CONTEMPLATION, THE
FAILURES, THE COMPROMISES
--- AND
EACH TIME I HUMBLED BY IT.
IN THE PAST (AND I AGAIN
COUNT THEM
AS PRIVILEDGES) I HAVE TAUGHT AT
TWO UNIVERSITIES. THESE
POSITIONS
WERE MY VERY BEST EMPLOYMENT
EXPERIENCES, AND I WOULD ADD THE
BANFF CENTRE FOR THE ARTS TO
THIS
LIST. ALL THREE ARE
INSTITUTIONS
WITH REMARKABLE RESOURCES AND
PURPOSE AND POTENTIAL. AND
THOUGH
THE MEDIUMS DIFFER,THEIR
FUNDAMENTS
ARE THE EXAMINATION AND
EXPRESSION
OF THE HUMAN CONDITION. WITHIN
THIS REALITY, I BELIEVE, LIE THE
ROOTS OF ALL THE HOSTILE
EXCHANGES
THAT HAVE PLAGUED MVA THESE LAST
MONTHS --- CERTAIN 'UNEXAMINED
LIVES' (IN THE SOCRATIC SENSE)
HAVE MADE FOR 'A LIFE NOT WORTH
LIVING'.
SCRATCH THE SURFACE AND THE
THEMES
OF ARTIST'S WORKS ALL COME
BACK TO
THEIR RELATION TO POWER ---
BE IT
POLITICAL, OR GENDER, OR
ECONOMIC,
OR A MILLION OTHER THINGS.
PREFERENTIAL TREATMENT AND OR
DEDICATION OF EXCESSIVE
RESOURCES,
BY 'POWER' TO THOSE DEEMED
IMPORTANT (BE THEY FACULTY OR
ARTISTS OR WHOEVER) IS JUST ONE
MORE MANIFESTATION OF WHAT THE
VAST MAJORITY OF ARTISTS WHOM I
HAVE WORKED WITH RAIL
AGAINST. SO
WHAT CAN A PERSON DO IN GOOD
CONSCIENCE. I'M TRULY SORRY
THAT
SILENCE IS NOT IN MY NATURE.
AND SO, KEN LUM, SHOULD HE BE
HATED.
NAAAH HE IS JUST ANOTHER
METAPHOR,
A PAWN IN THE SYSTEM THAT I
AM TOLD
IS THE 'ART WORLD'. BUT I AM
CONFUSED, FOR HOW CAN A WORLD BE
MADE UP OF PEOPLE
QUESTIONING POWER
AND WELCOME SUCH ABUSES OF
IT. I
HAVE BEEN TOLD THAT MY
REDUCTIO AD
ABSURDUM ARGUMENTS AGAINST
CONCEPTUAL VISUAL ART ARE
UNCLEAR,
THAT MY ASSERTION OF THE
SUBSTANTIVE OVER THE
CONCEPTUAL ARE
NAIVE. WHAT CAN I SAY, MY
BACK IS
AGAINST A META-WALL.
IN MY DEEPEST BEING I WISH FOR
PEACE. I ALSO WISH THAT I COULD
KEEP SILENT --- BUT I HAVE SEEN
THE 'STARK ANGST' IN TOO
MANY EYES.
IF I AM NAIVE CALL IT A LAST
FLICKER OF IDEALISM, IF IT'S MY
TRAGIC FLAW SO BE IT... BUT I
WOULD REALLY LIKE TO STICK
AROUND
AND SEE THE ANGST A WHOLE
LOT MORE.
Alert! Alert!
The
"Sucking Death"
approaches!